"you have cancer" .... now what?

[Jo]

again, i need to spend more time here. less drama

---------------------

today is my 1 year anniversary of the removal of my cancer. surviving since april 9, cancer free for 1 year.

the past year has been a trip... one i wish i would not have had to take but i guess i had no control over that. only the stamina that God provided to get through it.

having radiation has messed up my intestines. i was told this might happen and that the change might be life long. what i must do now is have a lifestyle that will keep the intestines as healthy as possible. my probiotic with the added yogurt seems to help alot. also, this week, i've been in the adbb veggie challenge and this has been a better week so far as the intestinal issues. perhaps the cutting back of meat and concentrating more on vegetables has been helpful. i'll need to research that a bit.

let me be clear about the intestinal issues, for anyone who might read this and might have to experience the same thing. upon recieving radiation, your oncologist will ask if you have any bowel issues. diarrhea might be one of these issues. that can be helped by eating a low fiber diet which your dr should supply a list of foods that will help you. also, dieticians can supply you with menus that will help. diarrhea was a problem DURING my radiation but diet helped to control it along with an anti diarrheal OTC medication.

my problem since radiation and for the last several months or longer has been mucous. without changing any diet, the problem was uncontrolable. the point of taking the probiotic and yogurt is to get that good bacteria into the intestines.

okay, that might be TMI but for the cervical cancer patient, it might at least gives a heads up on what to expect and what she can do to deal with it.

back to 1 year cancer free............
i've ordered a cervical cancer pin. i'm hopeing that comes soon. does it sound right that i'll wear it as a badge of honor? it will signify that i've been there, done that and SURVIVED.

lately, i think about the past year more and more. it's on anniversary days, upcoming dr. appointments and tests that bring on uneasy feelings. when my legs hurt, i think of lymphedema, sexual side effects make me remember to use my dilator and intestinal issues make me remember to supplement. there are constant daily and weekly reminders around me.

i'm reading what lana is experiencing and saddened by what she and others are going through. it's a situation where i want to do something but there is nothing i can do. know this, lana, you are constantly in my mind and thoughts.... "Pray without ceasing."—1 Thessalonians 5:17

this past week, lisa has posted about her wogging challenge... a walk/jog/run challenge that she and her buds are doing on may 9.
Walk/Run/Wog for the Ta-Ta's May 9th. i'm going to take part in that challenge.

i long for happy days when cancer is a fleeting thought, rarely thought of. i don't know if that will ever happen since i have this scar, my "war injury'.

these are all constant reminders of the past year, my life event.

[Jo]

today i recieved an invitation to the MEDCENTRAL CANCER SURVIVORS DAY celebration that is held at the county fairgrounds.
they enclosed a free ticket so a guest can come along with me. i would like to go and i hope dh will tag along. it's free dinner, door prizes and bingo... who could ask for anything more?

so if dh doesn't want to go, i'll find someone. i have someone in mind. she hasn't had cancer but she lives with an alcoholic/abusive man and i'd willing to bet she'd take me up on the offer. first dibs to my dh though.

hey, maybe i'll see that girl that i met at the radiation clinic, the one i gave the book to. i hope she is doing well. she has battled different types of cancer over the last 20 years.

gee, what a deal.... i'm diagnosed with cancer, have major surgery, 32 courses of radiation, a lengthy scar, possible life long intestinal problems, worry of recurrance, tests, scans, insurance paperwork, dr. visits galore and i get a free dinner for two at the fairgrounds.

[Jo]

reservtions are made and dh is going with me to the dinner. i was pleased that i didn't have to beg. i don't know why i though i would have to... he's been with me every step of the way.

the last couple days have been really good. nothing out of the ordinary, no discharge, intestines feeling better. there seems to be no rhyme or reason to this as i track food and such. the only thing i think that has changed is i'm not eating as much meat as i was before.

whatever, i'm enjoying the break from bowel issues.

i ordered my cervical cancer pin for my 1 year cancer free anniversary. i've been wearing it to work. so far, no one has asked what the pin is for and i don't really think they will. basically, everyone is wrapped in their own world but i'm not wearing it for them so asking is not required.

[Jo]

it's very hard to compare my journey with those who are suffering and are in life battles that are much worse than mine. velcrocat is one of these people. i pray God gives her a special measure of patience, support and love.


i've been in relatively good shape. once in while i have intestinal issues and i'm still trying to track down why this happens only on occassion. i actually think i've come up with something. red meat. it seems that when i eat red meat, the following day is not so good for me. i've been testing this therory and it seems to hold true. i will have to check into the relationship of eating red meat and intestinal issues after radiation.

bottom line.... i think several things can creat a problem for me. not eating till i'm famished [so not atkins], the eating of red meat, not getting enough water [so not atkins], probiotic or not and yougurt or not. combimations of these things can adjust + or - on how my intestines react.

[Jo]

i have a ct scan next week. this will be the first since pre surgery last year. all my other tests come back as clear but i'm still a little anxious about the scan.


i still question if you ever really just don't think about cancer after you've been stricken with the disease. i'm beginning to think the answer is 'no'. something will always trigger a thought.

[Jo]

i have a ct scan to do tomorrow then right afterwards, an appointment with my oncologist. the past couple days has been hard on me, mind wise, more than anything. i suppose working up to the scan has been weighing on me.
i went to a grad party on saturday and twice, while i was listening to conversations, the 'cervical cancer' issue came up. one guy had lost his wife and while i stood there listening, my sister kept looking at me, i guess to see what my reaction was going to be. then again, my mom, right out of the blue, told a guy she was talking to that i beat cancer. well..... i wouldn't say beat it, at least not yet. sometimes, i feel like it's whooping my butt.

i've got to call my radiology oncologist next week or maybe even the end of this week. i'm fed up with the intestinal issues. if i have to deal with this the rest of my life i'm going to be upset. with all the technology, all the advances, there has to be something that can be done.

[Jo]

my scan went fine but i was very tired. the procedure was a bit different than the last time. they change the 'contrast'. it was a better [using the term lightly] tasting contrast. the iv contrast was the same. i'll know results from the test maybe by next week. i'm not expecting any bad news.

the followup with my oncologist was non eventful. no sign of cancer from the last checkup. i'm figuring after any 3 month followup, if he sees something on the pap, he'll call me in right then.

[Jo]

NOTES

dh and i are going to a cancer survivors dinner tonight. The 22nd annual National Cancer Survivors Day is Sunday, June 7, 2009. the hospital in the neighboring town, where i had my radiation, organizes a dinner every year for their patient survivors and a guest.

the dinner, hosted by the hospital where i had my radiation, was great! really nice. some of the big wigs of the hospital were there to welcome us. i was pleased that a prayer was said for the meal.

upon arrival, we signed in and got our name tag [survivors only, not our guests] and we got a little 'cancer survivor' pin. we were able to go straight to the food line from that point.

they had bbq, chicken, hot dogs and burgers with sides of antipasto,all the usual burger/dog fixings, baked beans and different kinds of melons. they had packaged cookies for desert. i didn't have those but i saw almost everyone eating them up.

we played a few rounds of bingo. didn't win anything but we thought it was interesting that on one games, all i needed was a 48 to win. other door prizes were given but i didn't win any of those either. the grand prize was a tv. i was upset somewhat, over the people winning things. you would have thought the prize was a thousand bucks or something. when someone yelled bingo, they got real testy if a floor walker didn't come to them immediately. i mean, a few of them really got their panties in a wad over the whole thing. i told jack if i did win, i wasn't going to yell out anything because of the others behavior. and greedy! my goodness, we had some beatiful flowers on the tables and some of the greedy people walked out with 2 bingo prizes and 2 flowers!

besides the greediness, we had a good time. we didn't know anybody [i looked for the girl i had given the book to during radiation] but the whole gesture of treating the survivors to a meal, the time involved with set up, cooking, buying/getting prizes was certainly something to be appreciated.

i don't know the final tally of people who attended but they said it was more than last year and last year was over 1,000. i look forward to next year

[Jo]

my scan went fine but i was very tired. the procedure was a bit different than the last time. they change the 'contrast'. it was a better [using the term lightly] tasting contrast. the iv contrast was the same. i'll know results from the test maybe by next week. i'm not expecting any bad news.

i got a call from the oncologist and the report from the scan was as expected.... NO CANCER.

[Jo]

i have changed my probiotic. i am now taking Multi-Enzyme Probiotic Formula

http://www.amazon.com/Spring-Valley-...496515&sr=1-44

Product Description
Enzymes break down the nutritional components of proteins, fats and carbohydrates. With the addition of Probiotic Acidophilus, this formula is designed to be used as a digestive aid to promote healthy functioning of the intestinal system

the dosage is 3 tabs which i take throughout the day, mostly when i eat. it seems to be a better supplement for me than the other probiotic i was taking. it has more 'stuff'.

i think i have decided that red meat is just not going to be kind to me. maybe this will change as time goes on but i can hear my oncologist's words when he said "you may have some bowel issues that might last the rest of your life".

i believe i will be calling my radiology oncologist and finding out what he thinks about the intestinal issue.

cancer............. blech.